How To Keep Sparkly Emo Vampires Off Your Lawn by

How To Keep Sparkly Emo Vampires Off Your Lawn by Mike Cooley
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I read the other reviews and knew I had to read this. Any book vampire or other wise that makes you laugh out loud is a must read.
I noticed I could read it on Goodreads...so I did.
I was laughing and chuckling so much that I wound up having to read the book out loud for an audience. Thank goodness it is a short book. My 80 year old man voice wouldn't have lasted through a long one.

Do yourself a favor and read this. Mike Cooley has a great take on the Twilight series and all those undead who don't know how to properly behave.


View all my reviews

I found this on the Goodreads site. The author has no idea who I am or that I was reading his work.

And the Winner is....

And the Winner is....

   They only thought they had outgrown us. That they had left us behind with all the other superstitions. But we were there; just under the surface the whole time. Love and Hate are the two sides of the coin of life. There can never be one with out the other. But we are working to flip the coin to our side once and for all.

   We are the Gods and Goddesses of War.
 
   We have had many names, some well known, some not. Who has not heard the names Ares, Athena, Mars, and Seth, just to name a few. But our names from Babylonian, Assyrian, Mayan, and Aztec times are all but forgotten. The names of Erra, Ashur, Ah Chuy Kak, and Camaxtli are little known in today's world.

   We have worked tirelessly through out history trying many ways to come on top. But there was always someone there to remind people of the good side of man.

   The God of love has many names himself and many helpers. They are always there thwarting our attempts to rule the world of man.

   We can not win the battle face to face. That lesson has been learned well. So how do we win? There has been many a gathering dedicated to this problem until Ictinike came up with the solution...

   The way to win was to not have to face of the God of love. And how do we do that? By using the cover of love and protection to our advantage. We use the fact that the one God of love is known by many names to many people.

   We make man think he is protecting others from hate and intolerance. Because it may upset and cause anguish to the others; man will then forbid one group of the God of love's helpers from speaking out if another group is present. If no one is allowed to speak of love and acceptance, then the emotions of hate, intolerance, and evil will be able to rule. The coin will flip to our side and bury the other side at last.

   Yes, that is the way we will win the battle. We will rule the world and no one will be any the wiser.

©2011 Pamela Jo